I’ve been meaning to write. I was going to write a post about the first two weeks, and then it became the first three weeks and then four weeks. I’ve had time, but it’s so scattered and interruptible. I am still getting into this new rhythm of motherhood, and even in the first month, it’s changed so much week to week. The first two weeks were such a blur. Robbie was off for those two weeks, and we didn’t have a schedule or anywhere to be. I am so thankful he had that time off. Then he went back to work, and it was our first week in a somewhat “normal” scenario – our new normal anyway. Now we are in the third week of Robbie back at work and Eleanor and I hanging out.

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Eleanor is one month old today. I don’t think one month has gone so fast in all my life, and at the same time, it feels like six months have passed. To say life changes when you have a baby is such an understatement. You do everything you can leading up to the birth to prepare, but honestly, I don’t think anything can prepare you for what it’s like to have a baby.

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This month has been full of surprises and firsts and emotions and challenges and exhaustion. Every day that passes, I find myself more and more in love with this little girl. I am still wrapping my brain around the fact that Robbie and I created her. She’s part of me and part of him. When we found out we were pregnant, I wasn’t even four weeks along, and Eleanor was the size of an apple seed. Now she’s growing so quickly. I have no idea how much she weighs at this point. I can only tell by how clothes fit and lifting her all the time. Our once tiny bean has most definitely put on weight since she entered the world a month ago, though. She’s rockin’ the double chin, and she’s stretching out in length. We’ll find out how much she weighs in just a couple weeks.

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My hope is to update each month specifically on Eleanor. I am hoping to start brainstorming and planning a whole host of other posts, but I definitely want there to be some consistency with how I update about her. I also am hoping to do little photo shoots with her each month.

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To wrap up this post, though, I figured I would bullet point some main thoughts from this last month.

  • No book, advice or insane love of children can prepare you for being a parent. It’s its own unique experience unlike anything else.
  • Everyone said that you get really emotional a few days after giving birth, so I was prepared for that. However, no one said what you get emotional about, and that was totally surprising. I had this nostalgic emotion sweep over me a few days after having Eleanor that was really hard to cope with. I felt like I missed Robbie even though he was sitting right next to me. I chatted with a friend about it, and she was so wonderful in helping me understand what I was feeling. She basically said that there’s a bit of a grieving process that you go through – grieving the end of what was. It’s the end of one season and the start of another, and she really encouraged me to not feel guilty about it. I found myself crying for no reason during those few days with all the emotions and feelings, but it did get better and eventually went away completely after a few days of that. It’s crazy the process your body goes through and how much your hormones and new season truly affects everything.
  • Postpartum recovery had its challenges of course, but it was no where near as horrible as I had made it out to be in my head.
  • I’ve never wanted to work out so badly in all my life. I feel this massive need to get stronger, not just for my sake but for Eleanor’s. I want to be healthy and have more energy for her. Hopefully I’ll get the clear to start getting back into it in a couple weeks!
  • I am SO unbelievably thankful for the amount of breastfeeding support there is here in Australia and among my friends and family. I think Eleanor and I have had success because of how much others have taught me and supported me!
  • People will start coming out of nowhere to talk to you when you have a baby. Everyone loves babies, and when you are out and about, they are very friendly and helpful.
  • Lack of sleep is no joke, yet somehow I am coping. Would I give anything for a full night’s sleep? Of course. I am managing, though. It’s funny because when I was in college, lack of sleep really messed me up. I think God gives new parents a special grace to get through it, hey?
  • It’s really fun seeing Eleanor fit within our YWAM community. Everyone loves her already, and another YWAM kid, Lilly, is probably Eleanor’s biggest fan. She’s a year and a half, and she yells, “BUBBA” nearly every time she sees Eleanor. She loves shaking her hand and finding her feet. She gives her kisses and tries to share her cheerios with her, too. I can’t wait until Eleanor can interact with her a bit more; they’ll be best buds for sure.
  • I don’t remember what I used to take photos of…
  • My parents are bringing us a swing when they get here next week, and it can’t get here soon enough. On a positive note, Robbie and my arms are getting super strong!
  • I cannot imagine having more kids at this point. I know that will eventually change, but I am pretty happy for it to not change for a good, long while!
  • I can’t wait for my parents to get here in less than a week and to see them with Eleanor! It will be so special!!!
  • People love babies, yes, but there is this craziness that happens with girls, at least when it comes to shopping. I was so blessed that my mom threw me and Eleanor a baby shower last weekend that I FaceTimed in on. All I can say is that I am going to need to be very diligent about making sure Eleanor wears everything as she fits into it. Also…all the bows… I can’t wait!
  • I love being a mum!

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