For some reason, I am not feeling the Christmas spirit at all this year. This is such a foreign concept for me because I am normally a “Christmas music? In September? OK!” kind of girl. Before we flew back to the States, I felt this way as well. I said it a few times – “It just does not feel like Christmas this year.” I’ve been baffled by this and trying to figure out who this Scrooge is lurking in the corner trying to take over my holiday season.
Last year, we came home the week of Thanksgiving. Family was in town. We were immediately thrown into the holidays, and it was great. Plus, we had this great big secret (Eleanor’s on her way!) we were so excited to share with everyone we saw. The day after Thanksgiving, some people went Black Friday shopping, and some of us decorated for Christmas. It was busy and fun and eventful – right away.
This year, we came at the end of the first week of December, after Thanksgiving. It’s gotten off to a sloooooow and very tired start. (Ahem…Eleanor…jet lag…) We haven’t actually seen too many people yet, and we’ve sort of just been going day to day. I’ve felt somewhat like a zombie with coffee and a pep talk – let’s do this! Is this why it doesn’t feel like Christmas?
It’s also not too cold, not to mention we came from super hot temperatures in Australia. I did order a coat today. It’s been several years since I’ve gotten a new coat, and I am beyond excited. I had looked for a coat in Australia when winter was finishing, but I had no luck whatsoever. I decided I would get one when we got to the States. I had been looking online a bit before we came home, and I saw one on a blog I follow that I fell in love with. However, I did NOT fall in love with the price tag. We looked a bunch when we got home, but nothing compared to this one I saw online. I came home and looked online at every possible store I could think of, but again, nothing really compared. I had seen a coat I loved, and pretty much everything else was going to pale in comparison. THEN, this lovely coat decided to get marked down AND the store decided to have a sale. So I ordered it, and I am eagerly awaiting its arrival. All that to say, though, where’s the cold weather? Where’s the snow? Is this why it doesn’t feel like Christmas?
I am also in a totally new season of life. I can’t pick up and go whenever I please. I can’t stay up late just for the heck of it or go to bed whenever I’d like to because well, I’m a mum now and things need a bit more planning than that. As I am writing this, 11pm at night and Eleanor is hanging out here on her little play mat. “Sleep schmeep!” she says! Jet lag has totally kicked our butts, and unfortunately everything I’ve read about how to help them says that going back is worse. YAY ::sarcasm:: My mind is consumed with so many new and different things, and this is Eleanor’s first Christmas as well. It’s a totally different year. Is this why it doesn’t feel like Christmas?
At the end of the day, Christmas is one of my favorite seasons, and despite my lack of “Christmas cheer” this year, I am not giving up. The cookies, the movies, the decorations, the carols, the snow, the food, the family, the celebration – I love it all. Christmas, though – it’s really not primarily about all these things is it. That’s one thing I love about my faith in God – it’s founded in truth and not feelings. Thank goodness, too, because postpartum mums feelings are all.over.the.place. So Christmas is Christmas, and that’s not going to change because the truth is that Jesus’ birth happened and is worth celebrating. I may not feel “Christmas cheer”, but it’s still Christmas. I’m still going to celebrate. I am still going to be grateful that God decided to send Jesus’ as a baby to earth. (This concept has blown my mind since having a baby!)
Like anything else, when you don’t feel a certain way, the best thing you can do is to make choices you know will help. So I am going to do allllll the Christmas things. I am going to continue reflecting on Jesus’ birth and him as a baby. And you know what, it’s going to be a great Christmas. I know it.